Tonyjayg's Blog

Amazingly, the recipe needed to create a human being consists of the following:

Enough water to fill a ten gallon barrel.

Enough fat for ten bars of soap.

Enough carbon for nine thousand lead pencils.

Enough phosphorous for two thousand two hundred match heads.

Enough iron for one medium-sized nail.

Enough lime to whitewash a chicken coop.

Plus small quantities of magnesium, sulphur and other odds and ends.

Funny thing is, when I gathered together the above shopping list and dropped it into a bath of water, fuck all happened. It just lay in the bottom of the tub for two weeks looking like a pile of old rubbish.

And the nail went rusty.

I’ve tried chucking a party bucket of fried chicken in with it all just in case that might supply the missing chemical link, but still nothing. Two sachets of black pepper and a lemon wet wipe…

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Fickle Fate


Tonyjayg's Blog



Finding madness in life’s bitter dish

Eat like a mouse, drink like a fish


Clinging by nails, losing my grip

Clinging by nails, feeling them slip


Driven insane by worry and fears

Driven to drink that flows out in tears


Frustration and anger tearing apart

Noise in my head, pain in my heart


Limbo the place I’ve come to dwell

Emotions a prison, home but a cell


Thoughts they tumble, twist and whine

Thoughts so odd they can’t be mine


Drown them with the cheapest drink

But drunk or sober, think, think, think


No one to tell the things in my head

Solitary breakfast, alone to my bed


Escape into sleep is only too brief

Ponder if death would be a relief


Struggling on while heaving a sigh

Try to be strong though starting to cry


Did karma…

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